Intro to the Series
Polynomial is an in-progress series of fics all set in the same AU and timeline starting with the short intro of "Squared" followed by "Cubed". The main theme of the series is magical realism and curses, specifically a spin on the aptly named pussy curse where the cursed wakes up with, you guessed it, a pussy replacing their dick. But unlike the normal version of the curse that goes away after the cursed gets fucked, typically raw, the curse doesn't go away and instead it's a guarantee that they'll get pregnant.
I know that the whole thing is probably, or rather is weird. I mean who creates a fictional universe where guys dicks get magically disapeared only to guarantee that they'll get pregnant? The answer is me but I'm sure I'm not the only one who's done something like this. I mean some people just write straight up mpreg without any of the gentialia swapping, I respect it, my brain just needs for my weird fetish scenarios to be semi realistic. Anyways, lets get into the things you're probably here for.
FAQ (or what I would imagine are frequently asked questions)
- "Why?"
- "Okay but why make a webpage for it?"
- "How long are you planning to make the series?"
- "Why the names?"
- "How did the idea come up? It's not exactly a normal plot."
- "Holy shit, Cubed is long! Why is it so long?? How long have you been working on it?"
- "Why did you make XYZ decision?"
Mostly because I wanted to and I'm into it. Be the change you want to see in the world I guess?
Mostly so I can share other thoughts that don't always make it into the fic and keep track of things. I figured with as long as it's gotten it wouldn't be a bad idea to have like, a reference page or timeline y'know? While I have my spreadsheet for tracking the timeline, I'm not sharing that publicly since it's also where I plan out everything. Don't want to give away too much of the story. But also I figured it would be fun, kinda why I have hobbies like writing and this silly website in general y'know, to have fun. No other reason.
It's gonna go as long as I have ideas for it, not all of the fics will be as long as Cubed of course but I have a lot of plans for little fics about their life after the events of Cubed.
Well there's the obvious answer of the Deweys being called Dewey squared since there's two of them, so adding a third would make them Dewey cubed. The series name plays off of that since squared and cubed are polynomials. Yay math or whatever.
Funny enough it was all because of two of my friends (hi E and S) brought up Connor's stolen dick trick and just kept saying "THEY STOLE HIS DICK!!". The rest of it though, that was just me being horny. Sorry.
I've been working on it since May of 2024 and I NEVER meant for it to get as long as it has. I thought I would be done by August of '24 but as of writing this (August 2025) I'm still not done and it's nearing 400k words. I still have more to go too. Help.
I am beyond happy to answer any and all questions anyone might have on my tumblr
That being said, I'm always open to talk about Cubed or the series in general so feel free to stop by and chat with me.
Background Stuff and the AU
A lot of this is just me kinda doing whatever and coming up with things that may or may not make much sense so. Fair warning there I guess.
Background Relationships Mentioned/Hinted at
- Crosby*/Malkin
- Brodin/Eriksson Ek*
- Boldy/Faber
- Past Konecny/N. Patrick*
- Drouin/MacKinnon
- Past Suter/Parise
Players who have also been cursed
also marked above with an asterisk
- Crosby
- Eriksson Ek
- N. Patrick
- V. Dunn (hinted at)
- Drouin (hinted at)
- Spurgeon (not mentioned)
List of Curses/Magic in Universe
- Deaged
- Turned into an animal
- Silence
- Truth/Unable to lie
- Unable to tell the truth
- Amnesia
- Body swap
- Pussy curse/gentialia swap
- Pregnancy (which goes with the above)
- Full gender swap
- Mind reading
- Time travel/loop
- Obedience, aka "Ella Enchanted curse"
- Proximity curse
- Soul bond